07/10/07: Post by Franklin Stein
Posted by: BLOWBACK
What a great time we had in the Pacific Northwest! Tiny and Senyor did an outstanding job lining up what proved to be a fun set of gigs. Much appreciation to Ms. Meg who despite not sharing our views did share her home with us: MUCHAS GRACIAS!Enjoyed our gig at the FunHouse and enjoyed meeting EightHourDisease. Great seeing KT, our wonderful artiste, and a ton of friends. Very intrigued with the King N' Beast Sideshow of September 15. Not sure we'll make it but if we don't, it won't be from lack of wanting. Tiny had a lot of fun playing b-ball in the patio and i enjoyed talking to two cuates, Alfredo y Cesar. And no, to the kid who was up in my face part of the gig, i was NOT, i repeat NOT, wearing a toupee. I call my mohawk mullet my sanjaya.For me the highlight of the gig at Galway Arms was meeting the Ignorants from LA, especially Bo, Diego, and John. Very fun to watch and even more fun to hang with. Many thanks to Matt and Annie for letting us practice at their place all of the days we were in Seattle and for coming to this gig. And to the silent guy with the tophat who stayed in front of us for the whole gig - thanks bro for your silent encouragement.Later on, Friday, we heade to Portland. The live streaming gig at KPSU was characterized by a bunch of very nice engineers and it was good to meet Demian for the first time. Then the main event, Saturday the next day at BRAINSTAINS. http://www.brainstains.com A very great all-ages venue and community center, essentially the home of some very great folk. Great great people and energy there. They MUST meet the Beehive Collective in Maine. The two meeting is a natural.Only thing that was a little not-so-great was an exchange between three women and the vocalist for the band right before us (someone help me out - something about getting run over or something like that). The vocalist, a great guy in my opinion, in joking had said something to the effect that "if there are any drunk underage girls, our van is in the front". Not too different from a lot of comedy, and certainly a lot less than what i've heard Geroge Carlin. The women were understandably upset about how that comment could be taken - sure, i can see someone taking it literally and thinking that taking sexual advantage of a drunk person is fine or cool or funny - and so they confronted the vocalist. There was a back and forth that escalated a bit.For one, i think that this kind of discussion is GREAT but only if those engaged in the discussion are respectful. The women were clear that they felt personally offended and knew of other women there who were also offended. Fair enough. But i wonder, is getting in someone's face the way to resolve the different worldviews?One of the women at one point said to some of the young men that were defending the joke whether or not they would have felt so cavalier if the joke had been about raping little boys. Too bad i didn't have a chance to get more involved - had to run off to our set (got booed at the instagation of my bandmates for keeping everyone waiting) but i could have pointed them to our song BLACK TAR.What would i have done if the joke had been about a highschool physics teacher and p.e. coach in Charleston, SC, taking advantage of adolescent boys? I doubt i would have been so confrontational for my goal would have been to get the person to think about it a little and would have said "you know bro, that "joke" happened to me and it sucked..."Instead, in my opinion, the confrontational approach generated a defensive reaction to the point that even though i thought the vocalist was trying to listen a bit and explain his sense of humor - which i thought in part was beyond the call of duty - the discussion was more of a confrontation rather than a "can we try to figure this out together?: you think it's funny, i feel mortified, is there possibility of understanding each other?"Language is very tricky and i agree with the women: language can generate an atmosphere that permits or even encourages nasty things to happen. Thanks to changes in the law, this is called sexual harrassment and is an actionable offense. Part of what i'm trying to get at with BE SHIFT, beyond this particular issue but about language and confrontation in general. And yet, and yet, humor sometimes is very very harsh.I was glad the women were in an environment were they were able to bring this up, even in a belligerent fashion, but i wish we were ALL making more of an effort to communicate rather than to continue to perpetuate conflict. Although i tried to mediate a little bit, i felt that my input was unwelcome and possibly falling into a category of "you trypical malke, always trying to speak for us." Not the intention, just diffusing what was an unpleasant way for the other band to end a gig, obviously a gig where they had put heart and soul into it, gave away discs, and for which at best they got some gas money.Not to say one can be a cretin as long as one is also doing other good things, but if one is doing good things, they at least deserve the respect of a clear and open discussion, and not a confrontation in which they are incorrectly - in my opinion - accused of condoning rape.That notwithstanding, a great gig at BRAINSTAINS. Jerrald Love and many others: thanks for your energy and support!